Anxiety is a very common emotional disturbance. Often used interchangeably with stress, anxiety affects over 74% of the Indian population The American Psychological Association defines anxiety as an emotion related to feelings of tension, worried thoughts, physical sensations and anticipation of a future concern. Often it is referred to as fear, dread, excessive nervousness, uneasiness or restlessness. Common behaviours associated with anxiety are fidgeting, avoiding important tasks, procrastinating or even withdrawing.
While in some instances, a healthy concern can be a helpful motivator to complete important tasks, it can also go to such an extreme that instead of being helpful it in fact becomes a hurdle/obstacle to completing the task. While this can happen in a myriad of situational contexts, one of the prominent contexts anxiety occurs is in relationships.
When a partner experiences persistent doubt, fear or is consistently worried in a relationship it can be termed as relationship-based anxiety. They may also require constant reassurance, or even please their partner at the expense of their own needs. This can be taxing for both partners in a relationship. Concern about being accepted and loved can be a fleeting and realistic emotion most people experience in relationships. However, anxiety can develop when the worry becomes excessive, persistent and destructive for the person and the relationship.
For example, a healthy concern about the future of a relationship can ensure that both partners are satisfied in the relationship. However, in the same context, anxiety about the future of the relationship can lead to a partner seeking constant reassurance, and frequently doubting the relationship/partner, which can affect the overall health of the relationship, or even result in them ending the relationship prematurely out of fear. Therefore, anxiety can impair a person’s ability to function in the relationship which can be very detrimental and problematic.
Research demonstrates that 1 in 3 GenZ youth feel a significant impact on their mental wellness owing to relationship factors. It also suggests that relationships are the single largest source of stress for the GenZ population. So evidently, relationship anxiety is a significant and common disturbance faced. Despite this, only 33% of the GenZ population are open to seeking immediate professional help for their relationship troubles. While the reason for this is in itself an interesting topic for discussion, the focus of this article lies elsewhere. If you’re facing anxiety in your relationship, but are not willing to seek professional help at this time, it does not mean you should be resigned to your anxiety. Try these helpful ways to overcome your anxiety in your relationship in the meantime:
While some aspects of anxiety can be managed by oneself, sometimes overcoming it requires an expert’s help. We are complex beings and therefore getting specialized guidance from a trained therapist to manage anxiety in a relationship can be very helpful. Therapy can help you go beyond simple changes to making more concrete and lasting changes to your negative and dysfunctional attitudes. This will help you manage your anxiety to improve your current or future relationship.
About Author –
Hardika Zaveri –
Psychotherapist, Advanced level in REBT, AEI, NY
Hardika has completed her MSc. in Clinical Psychology from Erasmus University Rotterdam. She has been trained in REBT at the Advanced Level from the Albert Ellis Institute, New York. Hardika has previously worked with underprivileged children and cancer patients through various NGOs and also has prior experience working in a psychiatric clinic.
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